Trump Warns China Not To Underestimate His Willingness To Sacrifice Every American’s Well-Being

📆 5/23/2019 7:34 PM
📰 TheOnion

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WASHINGTON—Stating that he would be sticking to his guns regardless of the consequences, President Trump warned China in a White House press briefing Thursday that its leaders should not underestimate his willingness to sacrifice the well-being of every single person in the United States. “If you think for one second I’m about to back down on this trade war, you’ve clearly failed to grasp my complete indifference toward the entire population of my country,” said the president, who affirmed his unwavering commitment to letting the price of consumer goods rise, even if it meant a certain number of American families might struggle to make ends meet or be forced to go hungry. “I’m not about to lose a fight just because we have a bunch of farmers who depend on Chinese markets and workers who will lose their jobs if factories can’t get Chinese raw materials. Believe me, I can tolerate a tremendous amount of their pain.” Trump went on to state that most Americans are “great patriots” and willing to suffer so that he can get anything wants.

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such a selfless fellow; always looking out for our worst interests.

why does it feel like this might actually happen for the first time

bdragon74 scottlincicome

Not satire though. 😐

I thought this paper was satire 🤔

myburningblade myburningblade the spelling is willingless*

But keep your hands off my Eggos

Remember when wrote outlandish, hard to believe headlines? 🤔

6O0 ON GD L

Bullshit. Leave me out if it. You don't know what you are doing

If we're talking organ harvesting and concentration camps then China is all ears, up until that point he's an amateur in that area.

Wait. Is this one of those is-this-REALLY-a-satirical-Onion-article? articles?

Not far from the truth.

Thought you folks did parody?

I will throw every American under the bus to get what I want.

I know from CodePink & TulsiGabbard that a corrupt Kremlin-backed authoritarian willing to destroy his nation for power is the best sort of leader. People worldwide will hold HandsOffTrump protests to oppose destabilising US regime change. ✊🏽 NoUSRegimeChange HandsOffTrump

*except for his

When you can’t tell if it’s real news or an Onion article until you see who posted it.

i think thats china that doesnt care

Winnie the Pooh Gambit

Lol

Lmfaoooo. Whyyyyy 😂😂😃

🇮🇶🇮🇶🇮🇶🇮🇶🇮🇶🇮🇶✌️

JohnnyRadio WOW!! Wtf? 😱

I wish would go back to satire instead of just reporting news.

Funny because it truu -u-u.

Is this real news or not cause this shit isn't funny at all

empowergracewi What an appalling thing to say about Americans! tRump is an appalling person.😡

I’m going to steal this- for home

RealNews

This is sadly too accurate

so he hates us as much as we hate him

Nope. Not at all like Hitler. Not at all.

Excepting his own.

Getting kind of bored. You guys keep posting real shit

Kissing china's ass satirically of course

We want satire

Hey! You're supposed to publish satire not real news.

i’m dead. when are y’all finna start printing satire again?! 🤧🤔😂

I light a candle for you every day, you poor bastards. Hang in, this to shall pass.

i don't get it. what's the joke?

Trump to Xi :’ you are the only ones who don’t give a crap about your citizens’

Every American's well being - except his own.

I thought this was a satire site?

malaciouso Damn I thought this was real for a sec lol. Got me.

Everyone wants a good paying job with benefits and still wants to go to Walmart and buy a 100 flat screen TV. Pick one.

Onion posting real stories now makes it lose traction and credibility 🤨

Start printing satire, dammit.

This isn’t even funny anymore

The Onion posting real articles now?

They already know.

This is so close to fact that it’s even funnier.

China already sacrifices ... it's own ✔️

war comes at a great cost. Its a trade war not a trade friendship

Hes an insult to John Candy in Vacation. with that mouth.

Actually this headline is NOT satire!

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